Friday, April 20, 2007

Pushing Mock Turtles

Rain in Los Angeles in late-mid-April is a beautiful thing.

Have you read about the Cities of America? How about Natalie and Michael? (yes, the latter poem is a much-edited version of the original 8-part series.)

My lack of enthusiasm about the upcoming NBA playoffs disappeared after reading this - Billups pretty much sums up why I love basketball. My favorite quote: "The NBA Playoffs is the anti-March Madness. Cinderella gets knocked up and doomed to a life pushing mock turtles at Old Navy. Goliath uses David as a bottle opener..."

This Architecture in Helsinki song is my favorite song of this morning. Finally, they have a song that matches their great name.

And it's Friday. I like to make lists on Friday. So...

Here are my Top 6 Post Office / FedEx Experiences, in Chronological Order

1. Brea, California Post Office, 1990, back when they had the massive fortress of newspaper boxes and pay phones out front. The clerk was singing along to the Beatles' Help and she noticed me looking at her singing and she sneered "You're probably too young to know the Beatles." I wasn't. I'm not. In fact, Help was the #1 song in America the week I was born (in another country).

2. Edina, Minnesota Post Office, 1991, when the parking situation was abysmal but the interior was futuristic and old-seeming at the same time. I sent many letters from there. I can't remember a specific one but...

3. Arizona Avenue branch of the Santa Monica Post Office, 2004. You never forget the day you weigh your dissertation on one of those little metal scales.

4. Los Angeles Airport-area FedEx office, 2005. I had to ship something I didn't want to mail to someone I didn't like in Wyoming, to fulfill some ridiculous job-related requirements that didn't require filling but I needed to get paid so I did it and I remember hearing something I've since forgotten on the radio on the way there. It was a Monday.

5. Los Feliz branch of the Los Angeles Post Office, 2007, located on Vermont Ave., just across from Skylight Books and the underrated restaurant Fred 62... on the same side of the street as the staggeringly overrated House of Pies. But this isn't about restaurants. This is about mail facilities. Someone needs to fix that one machine. Other than that, I like the whole place - good parking, helpful staff, etc. But, you see, I mailed a letter from there to Beverly Hills, 5 miles away. It took 27 days to get there.

6. Los Angeles River-area FedEx office, 2007. Yesterday in fact. I picked up my sweet new phone there because the delivery guy didn't want to leave it on my porch or behind my unlocked fence. It was crazy there, right before closing. I heard one man yell to a clerk, "this is a fucking joke" before he stormed out, pushing the door with enough force to suggest that he was having a really bad day. I saw a woman offer unsolicited help to a confused man. Overall, a good experience. San Fernando Road on a cloudy pre-sunrise evening is pretty rad.

Yes I just said "rad." And I called my new phone "sweet." It's like it's 1989 up in here.

5 comments:

Obscura said...

Okay... so the Edina Post Office... was so bad... probably still is. I waited and waited and waited in so many long lines there... I'm getting irritated just thinking about it.

Oh, and I can't believe you sad "rad!" How old are you, anyway?

Obscura said...

AND you used the word "sweet!" Where are these teenage slang words coming from?

Ali said...

I'm 27

Jason said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jason said...

Best Post Office Experience - Mailing 16mm footage out to Burbank from the post office across Maryland Parkway from UNLV as an undergrad in the early-mid '90s. Once or twice I had it Fedexed because it was for an urgent assignment.

And this is just a quibble - Fred 62 is overrated and House of Pies is underrated. You got them mixed up. I'm sure you didn't mean to do it. Could happen to anyone when they're typing fast.

(see I made one right there. had to delete the previous comment.)